Guest Post: Resident Evil 7

Ever since the creation of Resident Evil 6, we’ve been anticipating the upcoming sequal to the Resident Evil series. And now, after years of waiting, Capcom has made our dream a reality! Traverse through the mysteries of the Baker family and find your missing wife Mia, who has been amiss for years! This post is a guest post, also posted in The Well Red Mage, you should check his stuff out sometime!

Welcome to the Family Son!                                                                                 -Jack Baker

Image result for ESRB symbol Fantasy Violence, Gore, Mature Language

This post contains some graphic imagery of fantasy violence, gore and mature language. Proceed at your own will. We are not responsible for the traumatization of anyone. If anyone is, however, traumatized… Sorry.

This guest post is a contribution to :The Well Red Mage! Check him out!

Ever since i bought the game on its released date, I’ve been binge gaming this particular piece of wonder for days. All those restless nights, retrying the levels over and over again! Resident Evil 7 is the next installment of the Resident evil series. After playing through Resident Evil 6, i couldn’t wait for the next Resident Evil… And Capcom finally made my dream a reality.

The game begins as Ethan (You) traverses to an abandoned mansion in search of his missing wife, Mia, who’s been amiss for years. Ethan enters the mansion and starts exploring before discovering an alarmingly dark secret of the mansion. Finding a cassette tape of several people “documenting” the house and being slaughtered by a humanoid figure. After traversing the mansion for a few more moments, Ethan finds Mia, imprisoned in what appears to be a basement of some sort. Making their escape, Mia suddenly becomes extremely violent and starts attacking Ethan. As a last effort, Ethan kills Mia and receives a call from Zoe, offering help to Ethan. After the call ends, Ethan finds that Mia’s thought-to-be-dead body has dissapeared and a revived Mia attacks Ethan, severing his hand. Jack Baker, the father of the Baker family, drags Ethan to another part of the mansion and holds him captive. He also stapled Ethan’s hand back on. How? Who knows?

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The battle between Ethan and Jack Baker. Ethan, eventually, severs Jack in half.

The Baker family is seen eating innards, human organs and other gruesome items that i’d better not mention as to render this post family-friendly enough. Jack along with his wife, Margaret and their son, Lucas, leaves the room. Ethan is left with an elderly women who is statue-still. Ethan proceeds to escape from the bounds that straps him to his chair and attempts to find a way out of the mansion. Upon entering a hallway, Ethan is attacked by Jack, holding a rake or a spade, i can’t remember… Upon defeating Jack, Zoe contacts Ethan again, telling him that Mia and the Baker family is infected with the same Ailment. Zoe has developed 2 serums that could cure them.

Ethan grabs the garage keys and rushes to the garage, only to be stopped by a police officer investigating a bloody arm on the ground. He stops Ethan and questions as to what Ethan is doing in the mansion. Before Ethan can spit out an answer, Jack splits open the officer’s head and his brain leaks out. As a split-second reaction, Ethan grabs the cop’s gun as Jack is beating the crap out of the already-dead cop. The two (Ethan and Jack) battles in the garage until eventually, Ethan defeats Jack in a struggle. Later,you’ll have another encounter with Jack until you sever his body in half. This is the end of Jack, for now.

After a brief encounter with Jack, Ethan makes his way outside and proceeds to another house, infested with bugs and insects of all sorts. Ethan then receives a call from Zoe, telling him to gather the remaining ingredients, used to produce the serum. Ethan then encounters Margaret. Margaret transforms into a spider-looking monster and proceeds to attack Ethan. Ethan eventually kills her and makes his way outside.

After the encounter, Ethan receives a call from Lucas (The Baker’s son) telling Ethan that he has Mia and Zoe and demands that Ethan does exactly as he says otherwise they’d be dead. Ethan, having no choice, follows Lucas’ demands and proceeds into a dangerous game that has killed many people before. Ethan, then lights a cake as Lucas demands. The cake (is actually a bomb), blows up. Lucas goes into a flying rage as the cake is supposed to light the whole place on fire, eventually killing Ethan in a gruesome manner.

Ethan escapes the death room and rejoins Mia and Zoe only to be attacked by a huge, monstrous, creature, Jack. Jack begins attacking Ethan, almost killing him. Zoe tosses one of the serum to Ethan and Ethan plunges the serum into Jack, ultimately seeling his fate. Upon discovering that he only has 1 serum left, the player is given the choice to cure Mia or Zoe.

Upon choosing Mia (which is what you should do. She’s your wife! Like, seriously!) The 2 escape the estate. Upon making their escape with a speedboat, the 2 discover a huge shipwreck. Mia and Ethan are then attacked by a black substance. Ethan blacks out and awakes, finding Mia gone.

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Ethan, on his way to the Shipwreck

Ethan then proceeds to traverse the shipwreck to find his long-lost wife. A recording is played as he enters one of the rooms. The recording shows that Evelyn ( a bioweapon developed by Umbrella Corp. has gone loose and is wrecking havoc on the ship. The recording tells the player that she has the ability to control minds). Ethan then discovers a serum that could kill Evelyn. Ethan goes into a battle with Evelyn and stabs the serum into her. But, as a surprise, Evelyn transforms into a huge, black creature, much like Jack and proceeds to attack Ethan. On the brink of death, several Apache helicopters strike Evelyn and a weapon is dropped beside Ethan, instructing him to shoot the monster. Upon doing so, Evelyn dies and a squad of soldiers drop down to extract Ethan and Mia from the scene. Upon the closing scene of the game, the Umbrella Corp. logo could be seen on the side of the choppers.

I’ve played the game so much times and done so much research that I’ve practically been desensitized by the images of gore…

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The Cover of Resident Evil 7: Biohazard

The 8-bit Review

visual Visuals: 11/10

The graphics of the game are seriously so life-like, we actually broke a computer playing this game. Let’s just say for all intense and purposes, a jump scare is worth around $450. The artists at Capcom has done an excellent job and the graphics of resident Evil 7: Biohazard has revolutionized the graphics of games. Surprising really.

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This guy, is gonna carve a word in your arm. That’s right… CARVE A WORD ON YOUR ARM…

Audio: 9/10

The eery background noises of Resident Evil 7 makes the game 10x scarier. Also, remember when i said Mia was gonna cut your hand? Well, i thought they actually cut someone’s hand off and recorded the sound. Yep, that’s how realistic the sounds are.

Gameplay: 7/10

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard isn’t your typical First-person shooter game! Well, technically it is. There isn’t much difference in the gameplay then any other FPS games. You craft health-kits (AKA chem fluids/herbs), weapons and run around collecting the necessary items to progress ingame. You’re pretty much watching a movie! Also, mind you that in this game, ammo is very limited and not as common as other FPS games. So remember to conserve ammo. Also i do question the crafting mechanics of Resident Evil 7. How does one, craft shotgun bullets from scrap? If anyone has any answers. Please, feel free to comment.

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A battle between Ethan and Jack Baker! Yes, he can withstand bullets! How? Don’t know!

story Narrative: 7/10

The dialogue and narration of Resident Evil 7 are realistic enough to be considered “great”. You’re pretty much watching a movie! I’ve got to give it to the voice actors at Capcom. They really went over the top with the voice acting.

familyfriendlinessFamily Friendliness: 5/10

Please, don’t play these near your kids. Seriously. The blood and gore should be rated 18+. We advice you to play this with caution.

scarinessScariness: 8/10

Resident Evil 7: Biohazard does a great job creeping people! You’re just peeping around corners, waiting for Jack to slice you the moment you peek your head through a door!

bingeworthinessBinge Worthiness: 7/10

When you first purchased Resident Evil 7:Biohazard, it’d be best if you started playing it right away and finished it in 2-3 days. Because if you do, put your controller down for a few days, you’ll eventually get bored of it. The first time you play it feels as if you’re playing the best game in the world. But the moment you get bored of it, even a little, trust me, you’re not gonna be playing it any longer.

castCast: 8/10

A cast of extremely talented actors/voice actors makes Resident Evil: 7 memorable. Most of the characters aren’t your everyday-ordinary Joe. The cast of Resident Evil: 7 are plagued with secrets, Such as the grandma , who turned out to be Evelyn. Did i say spoiler alert? Oops…

messageTheme: 2/10

I legit, do not see a moral/theme in Resident Evil 7 Biohazard. So really, i can’t grade it. On the off-chance that i do miss something, please let me know! I don’t know, maybe the moral is to not let your wife go missing for years…maybe? Or to not get involved with a mind-controlled family? Who knows?

accessibilityAccessibility: 8/10

Ever played an FPS game? Of course you have! The controls are relatively simple to learn. Heck, i skipped the tutorial for crying out loud! W,A,S,D moves your character forward, backward, and sideways while the left-mouse button shoots and the right-mouse button aims. As for melee weapons, the left mouse button slices and the right mouse button gets you in a “stab” stance where you’ll stab the enemy by clicking the left mouse button instead of slicing them. Also, pressing the “CTRL” button either heals you or crouches your character while shift makes you run. These are all, obviously, completely customizable in the menu.

diffChallenge: 9/10

The challenge level of Resident Evil 7 is pretty high. We recommend that you play some other FPS games first before starting your journey into Resident Evil 7. Remember when you played a difficult game and felt that you just had to, for whatever reason, punch a whole into your computer’s screen? Well you’re gonna punch a whole in 3 computer screens if you’re a beginner! When facing Jack, Mia or Margaret for the first time, i had to replay each of the boss battles multiple times.

replayReplayability: 6/10

Not much can be replayed in Resident Evil 7. The choices that really matter are only the ones at the end where you have to either pick Mia or Zoe to cure. Other then that, everything else is just… Same. There are some DLCs that could be downloaded and played and those are worth a try.

uniqueUniqueness: 4/10

It’s your typical FPS game. Same ingame mechanics, same game style. There are just so much FPS games out there. For a matter of fact, I’ve played so much FPS games that I’ve been completely bored out of my mind regarding them. But Resident Evil 7: Biohazard is definitely worth a shot.

pgradePersonal Grade: 7/10

Although we can all agree that Resident Evil 7 has good story and twists and turns that are worth some points, we can all also agree that there isn’t much originality  to Resident Evil 7. After playing with it for some time, FPS games become kinda boring. We have all seen FPS games with a crafting mechanic and a “Press F to resist attack”.

Note: “Multiplayer” and “Online Play” was removed because of the absence of them in Resident Evil 7: Biohazard

Aggregated Score: 7.5/10

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Disclaimer: Resident Evil 7: Biohazard is the rightful product of Capcom. I am not, in any way, (except for writing this article), related to the product in any way.


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